I took a thorough look in the "mirror" with this story and article. I am never pleased when I read an inflammatory article that works diligently to provide a separation between the people of the country. The article about the students in the classrooms leads new educators to believe they need to create a separation between how they prepare for students of color, which is an abusive use of scholarly information. New educators, and those in the profession long term, need to be looking at how to mend the disruptions of politicized color lines! This separation will never provide a positive route for unification on important matters. A country can only grow together or separate! The more American citizens allow the politicians to determine how we look at our neighbors, the more likely the country will divide. it does provide some interesting constructs about the situation within the story and women of America.
Throughout American history, several things have happened to the birthing process of the American woman—from being alone with a midwife in settlement days to being kept in a hospital for over a week with no real access to the infant during the 50s. (Rice, Norma. 2000) Speculatively, one could guess that these things altered to assist the new mom to acclimate to the new life they delivered. Over the last 30-35 years there have been integrations back to midwife presence during deliveries, family staying and helping with the new infant, and extended maternity leaves (I am always curious why some women get angry at these measures because they were designed to assist, but to some, it feels like control).
The couple in this story does not have any control—not over the loss or how they are dealing with the tragedy. Their culture plays a large role on both sides of their loss. The husband seems to be hit harder by the loss, which could be tied to him holding the deceased infant before the undertaker cremated the body. This is not a practice from his Indian culture, in fact, it is frowned upon. It was suggested by the American doctors that he should hold the infant and he had no guidance from others, like his deceased father. Holding the child weighed on him, and he kept it a secret from his wife. She, on the other hand, had a more Indian, culturally tied, family. She missed some of the rites, but her mother did come to take care of her after the loss of the baby. Interestingly enough, in Idia, the loss of an infant is shamed and there are zero instances where emotion is coddled. The husband can even take a new wife, who may provide the progeny needed to continue the familial line. The mother-in-law also seemed to blame the husband for not being around when the baby was born.
I make a tie here to a story that was told to me by my grandmother, whom I referenced above. She told me that in her mother's time, there were many stillbirths and lost children to various illnesses that could not be treated either due to lack of money or medical technology. The mothers had to continue because there was no one else to take care of the day-to-day. How is it that the industrialized world falls apart because one person calls someone else a name that they dislike, but cultures around the world move from one tragedy through another without the hangups that we seem to sift through?
References:
Goodwin, A. L. (2016). Who is in the classroom now? teacher preparation and the education of Immigrant Children. Educational Studies, 53(5), 433–449. https://doi.org/10.1080/00131946.2016.1261028
Lahiri, J. (1991). A temporary matter. New York; Houghton Mifflin.
Roberts, L. R., Anderson, B. A., Lee, J. W., & Montgomery, S. B. (2012b). Grief and women: Stillbirth in the social context of India. International Journal of Childbirth, 2(3), 187–198. https://doi.org/10.1891/2156-5287.2.3.187
Hi Jeanann,
ReplyDeleteI did not necessarily believe that Goodwin was trying to provide a separation between the people and the country. I think he was more pointing out that diverse and immigrant students need more accommodations to be as successful as "native" students and that there is a lack of knowledge of the specifics of immigrant students. Accommodations, done correctly, can help all students. Goodwin also describes teacher preparation classes to include more broad definitions of diversity, rather than being specific to prepare teacher candidates for diverse classrooms. A lot of the time when I am student teaching, I feel unprepared to help students who may be ELLs or immigrants, because I know that they will most likely need more help and accommodations. I think this is a lot because there is no way to know exactly how diverse the classroom that I am put in is going to be. I would like to hear more about what your thoughts were when reading Goodwin and how you thought what was said could be inflammatory.
I agree with you in that it seemed like Shukumar seemed to be hit harder by the loss of their child; however, this could be that even though it was through third person, we were still able to hear his thoughts on things and not Shoba's.
In your post, you mention that you think the husband seems to be hit harder from the loss. Do you think this is perhaps we only see his perspective? Do you think this is perhaps because people handle grief differently? How do you think their trauma would have looked had they been in their home country? Your ending comments about the hardships that others go through in other countries is intriguing. I think generalizations are tough to make about groups of people when we each have such different life stories and responses to our life experiences.
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