Brown - Week 6 Post

Because Shoba’s and Shukumar’s culture has many traditions associated with pregnancy and childbirth, which are different from the “norm” culture in the U.S., the loss of their child affected them in ways in which made it difficult to heal and move on. Shukumar’s description of what the doctor said really highlights a difference in cultures. He says, “The doctor explained that these things happen. He smiled in the kindest way it was possible to smile at people known only professionally. Shoba would be back on her feet in a few weeks. There was nothing to indicate that she would not be able to have children in the future” (Lahiri, 1998). While I was reading this, it gave off a feeling of lessening the importance that Shuba and Shukumar put on pregnancy and birth and that they could or should move on. According to the article “Learning from India's Postpartum Traditions,” mothers are given at least 6 weeks in a period of confinement where they heal from the pregnancy and bond with the child (“Learning,” n.d.). It is never really mentioned if Shoba was given time off to heal after the birth like how their culture suggests for mothers.

After the loss, the couple was not comfortable speaking to each other about what happened, so they avoided the grief by throwing themselves into work, in Shoba’s case, and study, in Shukumar’s case, which also lead to a decline in their relationship. According to Roberts et al., “In India, grief over stillbirths is hidden for several social and cultural reasons. If a woman loses a baby, repercussions from stillbirth may include stigma, blame for the poor reproductive outcome, abandonment and abuse, or loss of status and power within her husband's household because he may take a second wife” (2012). This could also be a reason as to why the loss is hitting them so hard. Especially if Shoba followed all of the traditions of eating healthy and preparing for the birth that are suggested in the “Learning from India’s Postpartum Traditions” article. However, there would be less stigma and blame from neighbors as they are living in a different culture.

I do not believe American culture puts as much emphasis on pregnancy as does Indian culture. In American culture, there is a lot more emphasis put on modern medicine, rather than more traditional medicine. Many of the rituals discussed in the “Hindu Baby Rites” article were very similar to what I have experienced with my brother having children and in my culture. However, there seems to be a lot more emphasis on these rituals for this culture. These rituals include a naming ceremony, the child’s first trip out, the child’s first taste of solid food, and the Simantonnyana or baby shower (“Religions,” 2009). In my family, these were more exciting stepstones rather than a ritual or tradition. As my culture is the “norm,” I have not had any experiences where my cultural practices were not available to me. However, I feel that when cultural practices that are norms to us are not available to support us, it can be confusing to navigate and may lead to feelings of loneliness and lack of support.

References

Lahiri, J. (1998). A temporary matter. The New Yorker. https://moodle.morningside.edu/mod/resource/view.php?id=1149987

Learning from India’s postpartum traditions. Nutrition Care of Rochester. (n.d.). https://www.nutritioncareofrochester.com/article.cfm?ArticleNumber=30

Religions - Hinduism: Baby rites. BBC. (2009). https://www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/hinduism/ritesrituals/baby.shtml

Roberts, L. R., Anderson, B. A., Lee, J. W., & Montgomery, S. B. (2012). Grief and Women: Stillbirth in the Social Context of India. International journal of childbirth, 2(3), 187–198. https://doi.org/10.1891/2156-5287.2.3.187